It isn’t a secret that penis size and appearance can affect the self-esteem and quality of life of an AMAB person. It is also not a secret that a soft penis and erect will be of different sizes. Both states are absolutely normal. In this material, we discuss flaccid penises, erection, questions on size, statistics, and all other related questions that might interest those unsure about their body image and health.
What is Soft Penis
For the most part, a soft penis that hangs loosely is in its normal state of rest. It can react to changes in external factors, such as temperature, just the same way other parts of your body would. For example, contact with cold will make the organ smaller—it is a natural reaction of the organism aiming at protection and heat preservation.
When the penis goes from soft to hard, it is called an erection. It is a physiologic process that starts in the brain. Following certain neural signals from the brain, blood rushed into the organ, engorging its cavernous tissues and making it larger and harder.
The most common trigger for erection is sexual arousal. It can be a response to physical stimulation or mental (when the person thinks about something that sexually excites them). Spontaneous erections, i.e. when waking up, are also possible.
Erectile Dysfunction
Erectile dysfunction, ED for short, is when the person develops too soft an erection to have or finish sexual intercourse—or when there is no erection at all.
ED can be devastating for self-esteem and relationships; it also deprives men of the ability to enjoy sex.
Soft vs Hard Penis
Obviously, the main difference between soft and hard penises is their sizes. It is also a sensitive topic for those who struggle with the toxic stereotype that penile length somehow defines manliness.
The clinical evidence, however, approaches the topic much more soberly and distractedly. Let us take a look at some statistics.
What is the average penis size?
Research says that the general perception of the average penis size is overestimated. Partly it has to do with the aforementioned stereotype and insecurities. Those who are not satisfied with their body image tend to compare themselves with others (not favorably) or misrepresent facts to protect their ego.
That said, a mean penis size that is determined statistically, can depend on the size of the participant pool and research method. For instance, a 1996 study has the following results:
- flaccid length: 8.8 cm
- stretched length: 12.4 cm
- erect length: 12.9 cm
A more recent study, published in 2014 in the British Journal of Urology International included more than 15,000 men and received the following numbers:
- flaccid length was 9.16 cm
- stretched length 13.24 cm
- erect length 13.12 cm
Is my penis normal?
A graph of the size distribution in this 2014 study shows that strong deviations in the length of erect penis are quite rare. Out of 100 men, only five would have an erect penis less than 10 cm, and only five would have an erect penis larger than 16 cm. This means that there is a 90% possibility that you are just like the other guy next door.
Male and female genitalia come in all variations of size and appearance. Thus, any organ is completely normal while it is healthy and functioning—and if not, it is entirely another story.
Penile measurement and how to do it
We do not recommend you to measure the so-called “stretched length” of your penis. Pulling it to elongate skin and muscle can give you a better idea of its erected size, but it is very easy to hurt yourself and cause physical damage in the process.
Instead, follow these steps:
- Obtain a tape measure or a ruler. Put its end (where the zero is) to the top of the organ, at the point of its connection to the pubic bone. If necessary, apply some pressure to compress fat.
- Measure to the glans tip (the rounded end of the penis). Do not include the length of the foreskin in the measurement.
You are magnificent! Now, if you want to measure the circumference, round the tape around the shaft’s middle or base.
What Causes a Soft Penis
Now that we have established that limp penises are completely normal for the majority of the time, let us discuss options for cases of erectile dysfunction. There are a lot of possible factors that make men flaccid when they want it the least.
Psychological
Our mental health has an immense effect on our physical well-being. Sexual performance is not an exception.
Stress and anxiety
If your mind is spiraling around trouble, it is hard to relax and enjoy intimacy. The brain is busy with negative thoughts and scenarios and will not focus on the present and pleasure. Moreover, stress makes your cortisol levels skyrocket; cortisol inhibits testosterone and, thus, libido and erection.
Relationship issues
If something bothers you in the relationship, and you subconsciously want to distance yourself from the partner, the feeling can easily manifest in ED. A pending conflict, mistrust, or even difference in sexual preferences you do not know how to resolve—all these could be a hidden cause of having a limp penis in the most romantic and intimate moment.
Depression
MDD, a major depressive disorder, alters how you think, feel, and behave. Depression is a common cause of libido loss and anorgasmia.
Physical
A source of erectile dysfunction can lie in your physical health as well.
Hormones
In AMAB persons, sex drive, erection, and sexual performance are tightly connected to testosterone levels. Hormone imbalance and testosterone deficiency can do you a low blow. ED from anabolic-androgenic steroids (synthetic analogs of testosterone used primarily by those who want to gain muscle mass quickly) is also not uncommon.
Medications
Certain medications can affect libido and even cause erectile dysfunction as a side effect. A common example of such drugs is antidepressants. If you are on a new therapy and notice signs of erectile dysfunction that you connect to your medicine, talk to your doctor. An alternative or dosage correlation might save the day.
Health conditions
Comorbidities and physical traumas that affect your circulation, hormone levels, mental state, and neural transmission, can be a cause of erectile dysfunction. For instance, diabetes (high blood sugar) is associated with low testosterone. Hypertension (high blood pressure) can obstruct blood flow.
Other
There are other underlying causes of erectile issues. Bad habits, such as smoking, can affect your blood pressure and cardiovascular health in general. A sedentary lifestyle hurts your microcirculation. A poor diet with a lot of red meat, processed products, and junk food, can result in vascular damage and hormone imbalance. Alcohol and substance abuse harm your overall well-being, from mental health to the nervous system.
Symptoms of Soft Penis
There are three main signs of erectile dysfunction:
- the person is mentally aroused, but the penis is too soft;
- erection lasts too short for a satisfactory intercourse;
- loss of interest in sex in general.
Treatment for Soft Penis
What are the options for those who want their penis to be hard when needed? There is no shortage of them. We remind you that close and honest communication with your doctor and sexual partner is the best way to address sexual dysfunctions most efficiently.
Medications
PDE5 inhibitors are FDA-approved medications for erectile dysfunction. They dilate blood vessels, improving circulation, so the blood can engorge penile tissues more easily and quickly. The most common PDE5 inhibitors are:
- Tadalafil (brand name Cialis)
- Sildenafil (brand name Viagra)
- Vardenafil (brand name Levitra)
They are available with a prescription and have contraindications, so if you think you might benefit from them, talk to your doctor.
Injections
ICI, intracavernosal injections, such as alprostadil and papaverine, are medications injected directly into the penis to produce an erection. They make blood vessels and smooth muscles in the penis relax to allow blood to rush in and make the organ erect.
Pumps
Pumps, or vacuum erection devices, create a low-pressure vacuum around the erectile tissue, drawing blood in and holding it inside, which makes the penis hard. Erection achieved with a pump lasts about 30 minutes; about 75% of men properly trained with a device can achieve it.
Surgery
Surgical treatment of erectile dysfunction includes dedicated penile implants inserted into the organ to make it hard. It is the last line of ED treatment used if other options fail.
Psychotherapy
Counseling helps you address the psychological causes of erectile issues, establish trust with your partner, and practice proactive and honest communication.
Summary
Soft vs hard penis opposition should never be because there are times and situations to have both. Softness is a normal state of the penis at rest, without arousal. If you are worried about the appearance of your penis, suspect health issues, or have trouble getting it erect, talk to your doctor to address those worries and enjoy good health and satisfactory sexual life.
FAQ
Why might a guy go soft?
Penis is normally flaccid if the person is not aroused. If the person cannot produce an erection, it might be a case of erectile dysfunction.
Why is my penis so small when soft?
Flaccid penises are smaller than erect ones because they are not filled with blood that rushes in during erection.
How does aging affect penis hardness?
Age comes with lower testosterone levels which causes erectile dysfunction. A person may also develop certain health issues associated with ED, such as hypertension, obesity, diabetes, etc.
Why is my erection soft?
There are many factors affecting the hardness of your erection: mood, stress, or even the temperature in the room. If you experience erectile issues often enough to start worrying about it, talk to your doctor to find the cause and address it.
